So youve done great job. We started day care 2-3x a week and yesterday I picked him up expecting him to smile and be happy to see me but he just looked away. Now a days she refuses my breast feeding. i feel that i been such a great mommy for him soo loving and careing his my everything but he started acting weird like a week ago it seems that he prefers his daddy more than me he works full time. I have not seen the same reaction for me. Those five weeks where he preferred his daddy over me where the hardest things Ive had to face since becoming a mum. I am a working mom and I leave her with her caretaker during the day since she was 2 months old. If you are dreading going back to work at the end of maternity leave or, indeed, know anyone going through the same who might get a little kick out of this . Just show you love them and never give up on them. When he's with me. Please someone help me with this I dont want to hate my mom but more than anything I dont want my son to bond better to her. As soon as I pass him to someone else he is quiet immediately. Then she goes back to not wanting me at all the next day. You can do it. Like many of you, I am a working mother who loves her baby girl more than anything in the world. i feel like he doesnt want me home and i know its bad to say but i dont even look forward to coming home anymore? It may be surprising, but the most common reason that your breastfed baby is likely refusing a bottle is because of their sensory and emotional needs. A two-year-old is demanding and it is his job to figure out what the world is like, which certainly includes a lot of testing and protesting. He does, I know. New moms might think it's just weight gain, lack of sleep, or nerves, causing . I wonder why this isnt written about or talked about more widely. I am with him most of anyone. A really good book to start with is: The Connected Parent: Real-Life Strategies for Building Trust and Attachment. By preparing during maternity leave, you can feel more empowered in your choice and ensure a smooth transition for you and your baby. This can make a toddler feel like mom has been taken away or even rejected. He is all for his grandad cause he treats him like his own son (but isnt that my job.) However, this is a normal reaction and the situation is far from hopeless. Thank you SO much for writing about this!! She wouldnt even look at me when I tried to comfort her. The wrong nipple was used and baby has become a little lazy. Most likely, your son is going through a phase when he is turning out towards the world. If you can work part-time, do so. First of all, I think you should try to talk to your parents about how you feel and that you need their help. I kind of hid behind work and did not take the time to bond with my baby boy. I just googled and found this website.. and saw I was not alone. Anybody who has been the same boat please help in trying to mend things and get my kid to like us both equally. I dont want this to have any lasting affects on our long term relationship. I dont know what to do, I have to work to support her, and I want that bond. his my world!! Though it seems that my daughter doesnt even want me when Im there, she is always clinging to her grandma it hurts a lot when i see her do that, i mean Im the one that has stayed awake for her all night when she was sick, i am the one that does everything for her. Please help! I am so confused and sad. And since then, everytimes she sees my friend, she follows her instead of me. I just know it can be the case no matter what you do. Please advice what should I do. Babies have a huge radar for love. However, since she was 8+months, she has been fighting me and does not want me to hold her when she sees her caretaker. During the COVID-19 pandemic, the number of women in the workforce fell by 500,000 more than men.And in early 2022, Deloitte reported that 53% of women had higher stress levels than the previous year. I understand how worried you are, especially since you are expecting a second child in two months. My mom realizes and tries to reduce it a little, but to no avail. My Mom is the one that takes care of most things around the house while I am working. What more should I do, she doesnt even sleep in her cot cause I want her next to me during the night but still as soon as she wakes up and my mother comes in the room she wants to be with her! While the rate for men with children under 18 hovered between 92.2% and 95.3% depending on child age, the rate for women with children under 18 ranged from 63.8% and 77%. I am really glad to see that I am not the only one with this problem. My daughter prefers my mother, as she looks after her while Im at college. she cries for grand mother . I feel like why I didnt die when she was born. She rather suck her thumb than sucking the bottle. I feel so much for you! going to bed, having her diaper changed, eating (weve had problems with her wanting to eatanother issue entirely), etc.). I just want to know what is going on with my child and why she is acting out like this. It also sounds as if you are not in a place where you feel supported or comforted in your experiences. I think she hates me because of my low moments and it hurts me that I cant take them back. At 9 mos I was in a lot of despair over the obvious lack of bonding between me and my son. I thought I was doing the best thing for myself and my daughter. I know he is only 9 months but shouldnt 9 month old babies already recognise their mothers? When you feel rejected, she will sense your reactions and you end up in vicious circle of guilt, sadness, rejection, and more sadness and guilt. I try to play with her and make her laugh all the time. should i just let her be with whoever she wants to be with? Introduce the bottle to your baby at least three weeks before your start date, slowly adding more pumped-milk feedings. why does my 17 month old ignore me?? What scares me the most is that I dont want her to start having tantrums when she cant get what she wants. My son is fine with me round anyone else. She didnt when she newborn and she doesnt now. Shes the most amazing thing in the world. My concern would be if s/he was not bonding with ANYONE, that would indicate a different problem altogether. i feel so usless at the moment, i have a 5 month old daughter who in my mind hates the bones of me, as soon as her dad wakes in the morning to go to work she screams the place down for at least 3 hours,i just cant do anything to calm her down, when i finally get her settled again i just find my self breaking down in tears infront of my 2 year old son, he gives me a big hug and tells me that he loves me, i feel like i am doing everything on my own, my partners mother only lives round the corner but she is as helpful as a glass hammer, she has my partners 2 sons from his ex partner every weekend but she wont do with my daughter, my parents help me as much as they can, but they also have jobs to do. Sadly even then I think this hard-wiring can persist until well into school years, maybe beyond. Im a stay at home mom and spend pretty much all my time with her. He goes to grandma no matter what but me no its very hard not to get upset but I cant even write a sentence without crying now. I did everything a mom should do with their child. That doesnt mean that he doesnt love you. From all Ive read, shifting affections in young children is normal as they grow and develop. Say he only listens to his dad and not me, not sure what to do , he is 7. Please help me!! At the moment we are living in India with my husband and his parent, my son seems to be attached to them more than me. If changing diapers with mom means that she gets to play with a special diaper toy and that mom sings a song and tickles her, or that she gets to feed herself and teddy bear (and mom) with a brand-new spoon, or that bedtime means a warm bath in the tub with mom, then these situation can be made less of power struggles too. Do whatever it takes to push her to her place. I want to tell you: this will pass. If it is fairly new maximum 1 year or so what is going on is actually a completely natural development stage in your daughters life. So they want to carried around the clock, wont play by themselves, cant be handed over to anyone else but mom or possibly dad without screaming like there was no tomorrow. My mom used to take care of her during the afternoon so I could study. Frankly, Im glad Im not the only one in the world who is going through this. If you are going back to work at 6 weeks, you could start introducing your baby to a bottle about two weeks beforehand. This is NOT just a phase. for a couple of hours, she just hugged me while eyeing him and after accepting the fact that daddy was really there in person, she just went 2 daddy like he never left. He always trying to get daddys attention instead. What you need to do is to take a step back and stop taking your daughters preferences as evidence that you have done everything wrong. By Alice Gibbs On 6/23/22 at 12:17 PM EDT. We laugh all the time! Mom gets into the bathtub, full of warm (not hot) water with baby. our babies love us. You sound like a fabulous mom. Praise your wife when she manages to be cool about it it isnt easy! Find reliable childcare Getting childcare is one of the toughest aspects of going back to work. It is a short time when our children really need us as badly as when they are babies and young toddlers. I have only returned this week to work after 11 months off with my 11 month old baby girl. There are studies showing that babies that are being held a lot actually become independent faster. I just adopted a 22-month-old girl, I have had her a week and a half. Being just 1 month old (you can read about the milestones of a 1 month old baby here), your daughter doesnt think anyone is her mom she is just reacting to what feels the most secure. You are unhappy and your son and you dont have much fun together. I have 11 month old baby and until 3 weeks ago I was 24 hours with him. This means (in your daughters case) that only dad will do, that she might express that she wants to marry dad and that she might protest violently if you and your wife kiss, for example. I dont know what to do, It really bothers me that she would rather be with my parents then her mother. Instead allow yourself to really enjoy your time with your daughter. blessings to you all. It will pass. It is good to know that I am not the only who has this feeling that their own children doesnt love them. But I feel like there are some differences, too. i relly need some advise before i go crazy please :(. If he is upset, he wants his daddy to comfort him, not me. Thank you for letting us know that things got better, it has made all the difference to me. He just screams in my arms. Ive read what Paula has said many times about the excitement of being with someone different and I understand. Since leaving home 2 go 2 Asia when our baby was 7 months, our internet routine continued. My daughter is 15months old. Ignore the unwanted behaviour and praise the good an all that but God its hard when my feelings are in shreds. So a temporary solution is essential. Everyone has told me that boys love their mommy and Im sure he does but I wish he didnt do that because like the other moms on this site, it really hurts my feelings. If we know why this is happening maybe we can change it! Do a workday practice run and consider returning part-time at first if possible. Im assuming this is not the case with you, obviously. I get up with him in the middle of the night when Im so tired I could die. It started off with biting and scratching and now she is hitting me. Its easy to be an outsider giving advice, but take it from someone who felt similarly rejected by her own child, I really urge you to consider seeking help and support from a source not on the inside of your situation. Method 1: Take the Baby for a Walk in a Baby Carrier Facing Out Now that you have your bottle ready, it's time to get started. You dont have to agree on everything, but some general principles would probably be very helpful. It really hurts. I have a 14.5 month old baby girl. Mostly because he or she is a baby who really has no idea what "work" is, but also because you're a good mom who loves her baby no matter what. I started wrk after 4 mths of her birth . So in short, my role is to lay down the law, but in return, he wants nothing to do with me day or night! Am really worried if everything is ok with her, like if she is mentally growing. First thing to remember is to feed the baby. I might as well try to change my perception of what is happening. thank you for writing tips on coping. in return they are telling me dun seperate them from my child wat can i do . Consider co-sleeping, where your daughter sleeps between the two of you. 7) Be patient with yourselfat home and at work. If it is your mother, rather than you who spends most of the time with your daughter, it is quite natural that she feels more secure with her right now. I feel like shes afraid that everytime I pick her up Im taking her to do something she doesnt like or finds unpleasant. Ive spent a fortune on psychotherapy and self- help groups, and I still suffer. During this time mom is often the only person accepted, which can drive both mom and dad crazy. He cries when I try to do anything for him and wont look at me. This will not affect your long-term relationship in any way, as long as you can stay cool about it. I dont think putting your whole life in a more stressful state by moving should be your first choice, in case living with your mom works well in all other aspects.
William And Rose Hanbury Baby,
Tdcj Units On Lockdown 2022,
Janelle Ginestra And Will Adams Married,
Soo Evening News Obituaries,
Articles B